[b]the subtle art of farting...........

Flatulence is the presence of a mixture of gases known as flatus in the digestive tract of mammals expelled from the rectum.................!

but actually.............to cut the crap(and the fart)......................
its..........hold ur breath...............quite literally...............!
its farting.........................!!!!!!


the most disgustingly beautiful act of man ever chronicled.....................!!!!!!

there is nothing,n i mean nothin,in the whole wide world,that can actually match the sense of satisfaction after a passing of wind n baskin n probably sniffin 2 in its glory..............
leavin the on lookers & on sniffers befuddled............!!!!!
wid dat luk on their face dat u now emulate after u did a your job,u too luk around wid a questn mark and suspicion writ large on your faces..................
smiling all the while from inside.................
n feelin relieved too.............!!!!
but interestingly,u r one with the most distorted facial expression of all............!!!!!!
but maybe thats causal............
cuz u r d one mst cncerned bout the reach of your very own gastronomical creation..............!!!!
so u end up being the biggest sniffer..........!
once everybdy elses expressions change to normal n u can boast of an avg/less than avg stares per person...........
u can assure urself of a job well done...........!!!!!!!

for ppl new n averse to farting............
lemme tel u one thng..................
farting is great for health.................!!!!!!!
u dnt believe me.....................?????
chek this out.....................

As a normal body function, the action of farting is an important signal of normal bowel activity and hence is often documented by nursing staff following surgical or other treatment of patients.

n thats our very own wikipedia............!!!!!!

if u dnt believe that..........here s a limerick supporting farting.............

beans,beans,gud for heart............
the more you eat............
the more you fart..............
the more you fart,the better you feel............
so have beans in every meal.........................!!!!!!!

for more benefits of farting refer some buk of roald dahl which i dnt remember..........
it gives the upsides of farting wen compared to burping.........!!!!

in the last 21 years that i have been around,i have come across many kind of farters and farts..........!!!!

form ppl who are segmented farters who sound like a enfield revving up to its famous ear shattering clangor and ending up in a noisy engine seize............!!!!
to the smarter farters or smart farts as i lovingly col them who use all of their IQs and sophistication to calculate that rate of maximum air discharge per sec that wud end in a perfectly noiseless fart............!!!!!

as a rule just remember,the noiseless farts are the smelliest ones...........!!!
there you go again........
dnt believe me................
heres a limerick again...........!
this tym in bengali.................

"zorer paade gondho nei..............
..................fus fusani pran chole jaye"

artharth.........

a sound fart is devoid of any smell................but my soul departs wen its a noiseless one.......!!!

but i salute the ones i call motional farters............
i wunt col them unsophisticated.............
but of i percieve them to ones with genetically weaker bum tissues.....................
otherwise wat on earth pushes them to lift their bum to a precise angle of 15 degrees and let out a shadow of a fart............!?????!!!!
the answer is simple................
the rebound of fast moving hot air is too much for them to take...........!!!!!!!
my sympathies..............!!!!!!

the are not many singers are us......and that is a lil tragic................
for those who dont realise that there is a lil musician in every one of us..........!!!!
itching to to gush out our intestines and show wat its worth.................!

not many people actually recognize this genius................
but at some point of time the genius does come out,no matter how hard u squeeze your butts togedr.............!!!!!
the result...............

a fart with all different pitches and notes that one can possibly think off.............
a strange concoction of of farts own sargam(wich incidently only has three sounds.......ooooooo.....eeeeee..............ffffffffff & ............t)
in this kind the syllables gain predominance...........!!!!!
its a relatively tough thing to do and the whole ordeal leaves you red faced(pun intended!!!!)

but personally i like the rebel farters.........!!!!
need an example(strictly in case you dnt know me)...............????
the nutty professor family??????
the one that farts at will and feels proud about it....................!??!!!?
i wish i cud...........!
but den u cant get all the gud things in lyf can you..........?!!!???

anyways,its a very extensive topic and i cnt really explain it with actually letting you have an insight on the various fartanory aromas...........

so i will keep the rest for later......................!
enjoy n have a fartablous day............!!!!
until next time,keep farting...............!
cuz as the say............
"the farts must go on...........!!!"